DENVER, Colorado—The Mile-High City’s weather forecast this week reads like a ransom note Mother Nature scribbled on the back of a bar napkin: 70°F on Monday, 7 inches of snow by Wednesday, and a 30% chance of existential dread by the weekend. To the average Coloradan this is merely Tuesday; to the rest of the…
The Thunder in the Void: Why Benin vs Lesotho Is the Geo-Political Cage Match Nobody Ordered By the time you read this, the world’s attention will have already flitted elsewhere—probably to whatever tropical island a crypto billionaire just sank his yacht on—but for one shimmering, slightly ridiculous moment, the planet’s idle gaze fixed itself on…
Kingdom Hearts 4: The Planet-Spanning Power Fantasy We Can’t Quit By Cora Voss, Senior Correspondent, Dave’s Locker International Bureau It’s 2025, half the Northern Hemisphere is either on fire or underwater, and the other half is arguing on Discord about whether Sora’s new sneakers constitute cultural appropriation. Yet here we are—again—salivating over a fresh trailer…
Dancing With the Stars Premiere: When the Globe Pauses to Watch C-List Glitter Diplomacy In a week when the Arctic Circle reported its first rain-on-snow-in-August event and the Bank of Japan quietly debated whether to let the yen commit honorable seppuku, roughly seventeen million people from Reykjavík to Reykjavík (via Perth, Lagos, and that one…
The Andes vs. the Chaco: Why a Tuesday Night Qualifier in Asunción Matters More Than Your Mortgage Rate By Our Man in Lima, Still Waiting for the Bus In any other week, the planet’s attention would be fixed on the usual circus: a G-7 finance minister explaining how “transitory” now means “permanent,” or a tech…
Brazil vs Bolivia: A Quiet Derby for the Soul of South America By: Our Man in a Hammock with Wi-Fi RIO DE JANEIRO—While the rest of the planet was busy measuring the global recession in crypto-converted lattés and wondering whether World War III will be fought on TikTok, Brazil and Bolivia spent last week conducting…
THE QUIET IMPERIALISM OF HENRY BIENEN, OR HOW A NORTHWESTERN PRESIDENT TAUGHT THE WORLD TO LOVE ITS NEOLIBERAL OVERLORDS By Our Correspondent Somewhere Between the Quad and the IMF It is tempting, in the age of instant outrage and TikTok summits, to dismiss Henry Bienen as a quaint Midwestern apparition: tweed, tortoiseshell glasses, and the…
Elizabeth Tsurkov and the Global Hostage Economy: A Graduate Student, a War, and the Price of Curiosity By Dave’s Locker Foreign Desk When Elizabeth Tsurkov, a Russian-Israeli doctoral candidate at Princeton, vanished in Baghdad last March, the world performed its now-customary shrug: another intellectual swallowed by the Levantine wood-chipper. Nine months later, the Islamic Resistance…
Larry Ellison and the Global Art of Owning Absolutely Everything By Dave’s Locker’s Senior Cynic-at-Large Somewhere between the ninth espresso and the tenth zero in his net-worth spreadsheet, Larry Ellison crossed the invisible line that separates “billionaire” from “minor deity.” The rest of the planet—those of us still fumbling for small change in the sofa—watched…
Marc Guéhi and the Quiet Art of Empire Maintenance By Our Man in the Cheap Seats, somewhere above the M4 Marc Guéhi is the sort of name that makes global powerbrokers yawn and then, three seconds later, frantically open a new tab. To the average punter from São Paulo to Singapore, he sounds like a…
Wigan Athletic’s Norwegian teenager, Thelo Aasgaard, has spent the past fortnight doing something no Scandinavian export has managed since flat-pack furniture: forcing the world to read the assembly instructions. One dazzling League One hat-trick later and the 20-year-old’s name is being Googled from Lagos to Lima by people who previously thought “Aasgaard” was either an…
The Left Arm That Shook the Globe By Diego “Digger” Santangelo, International Correspondent Somewhere above the Mediterranean, on a chartered El Al flight in October 1965, Sandy Koufax told the captain he would not be pitching Game 1 of the World Series. The reason? Yom Kippur, the holiest day in the Jewish calendar. Up in…
