Bradley Cooper: The Last American Export That Still Works GENEVA—While the U.S. dollar wobbles like a drunk tourist on the Pont des Arts and Silicon Valley’s greatest minds debate whether reality is merely a subscription tier, one product from the former superpower continues to clear customs without a cavity search: Bradley Cooper. Yes, the man…
Radio X: The Little Frequency That Outran the World by Our Man in the Ionosphere, filing from everywhere at once Somewhere above the 49th parallel, a transmitter the size of a garden shed is humming at 101.9 FM. Locals call it Radio X; geographers might call it 45.5017° N, 73.5673° W; the CIA probably calls…
Chris Wilder, Sheffield United, and the Global Art of Not Quite Dying By our correspondent in the away end, nursing a £7 pie and an existential crisis The official line is that Sheffield United “parted company” with Chris Wilder on 25 March, which is boardroom code for “we fired him by WhatsApp while the rest…
House Spiders: The Eight-Legged Diplomats Quietly Outmaneuvering Humanity in Every Hemisphere By the time you finish this sentence, approximately 3,800 house spiders will have successfully negotiated new rent-free leases in human dwellings from Lagos to Ljubljana. While we obsess over trade wars, carbon credits, and whose algorithmic overlord has the shiniest new update, the true…
Billy Idol: The Last British Export That Survived Globalization, Brexit, and TikTok By the time most pop careers have been recycled into supermarket soundtracks and ironic T-shirt slogans, Billy Idol – perpetual sneer, leather that looks older than several EU member states, and a sneeze-and-you-miss-it baritone – is still prowling stages from Santiago to Singapore….
The 2025 Ryder Cup will tee off next September on Long Island’s Bethpage Black, that charming municipal brute where the rough is thicker than a Moscow winter and the locals greet visitors with a warmth normally reserved for parking tickets. For one week the planet will pretend golf is life-or-death, which is adorable considering several…
Storm Amy: A Mild Tempest in the Global Teacup By Our Correspondent Who Has Covered Actual Hurricanes and Still Pays Rent in Euros COPENHAGEN—Somewhere between the Baltic’s sullen drizzle and the North Sea’s theatrical sighs, Storm Amy made landfall last night. The Danish Meteorological Institute dutifully hoisted a yellow warning, which in Scandinavian color-coding roughly…
Diane Abbott: Britain’s Walking Political Rorschach Test and the World’s Favorite Punchline By Dave’s Locker International Affairs Desk PARIS—In the grand bazaar of global politics, where every nation hawks its own bespoke outrage, Diane Abbott has become the souvenir snow-globe everyone loves to shake. From Lagos taxi drivers to Tokyo policy wonks, mention the MP…
Nobody Wants This—But the Planet Keeps Getting It Anyway By Our Man in the Departures Lounge GENEVA—At precisely 14:03 Central European Time, the latest global consensus was delivered via diplomatic cable, subtitled tweet, and a half-hearted Slack emoji: “Nobody wants this.” The memo, drafted in six languages and one exhausted sigh, refers to everything from…
Roads, Rivers, and the Great Global Parking Lot By Our Man in Every Gridlock Somewhere between the 38th parallel and the M25, humanity has perfected the art of not going anywhere. From Lagos’ Third Mainland Bridge—now a floating marketplace of street hawkers and pent-up testosterone—to the elegant immobility of Los Angeles’ 405 at sunset, the…
**The Severn Bridge: Humanity’s 1.6-Mile Monument to Not Getting Wet Ankles** While the rest of the world debates whether bridges should connect people or keep them out, Wales and England have been quietly perfecting the art of suspended cooperation since 1966. The Severn Bridge—two miles of steel and concrete that somehow manages to unite the…
The Red Planet’s Newest Roommates: Earth’s Bureaucrats, Billionaires, and Bored Teenagers By Dave’s Locker Foreign Desk Cape Canaveral—In the latest episode of “Planet Earth: The Spin-Off Nobody Asked For,” NASA has unveiled a 30-page “Mars Surface Habitability Framework” that reads like a condo association’s welcome packet, only with more radiation warnings and fewer parking spaces….
