The Curious Case of D.J. Moore: How a 190-Pound American Gladiator Quietly Became the Canary in Globalization’s Coal Mine By Matteo “Macabre” Moretti, International Correspondent, Dave’s Locker From the air-conditioned war rooms of NFL analytics departments to the sweat-soaked living rooms of Lagos, Nigeria—where Monday-morning quarterbacks stream games off sketchy websites—D.J. Moore has become an…
The Accidental Ambassadorship of Emmet Sheehan, or How a Baseball Arm Became a Geopolitical Curveball By L. Marlowe, International Correspondent, somewhere between Narita and Logan TOKYO—When Emmet Sheehan’s 95-mph fastball whistled past Yuki Yanagita in the sixth inning of a sleepy June interleague game, it did more than freeze a cleanup hitter. It froze, very…
The World According to Miles Sanders A dispatch from the global bureau of running backs, currency fluctuations, and existential dread. By the time Miles Sanders ripped off a 42-yard touchdown against the Bears last season, the yen had already slipped to a 34-year low and a container of kimbap in Seoul cost more than a…
The Minnesota Lynx—officially the “MN Lynx” to anyone who’s ever tried to cram a Midwestern tongue-twister into a 280-character tweet—have, for reasons no algorithm can fully explain, become a minor Rorschach test for the rest of the planet. On paper they’re merely a WNBA franchise that plays in a city so cold its airport sells…
The Eternal Oval: NASCAR’s Global Relevance in an Age of Electric Regret By Dave’s Foreign Correspondent-at-Large, still jet-lagged in Charlotte CHARLOTTE—Somewhere between the smell of burnt ethanol and the distant hum of a C-130 practicing touch-and-go at the nearby Air National Guard base, it dawned on me that NASCAR is either the last honest religion…
The Curious Case of Luther Burden III: How a 19-Year-Old from East St. Louis Accidentally Became a Geopolitical Pawn By the time Luther Burden III stiff-armed his way into the end zone against Kansas State last November, grain futures in Kyiv ticked upward 0.3 percent. Not because the sophomore wide receiver has any known sway…
PARIS—Somewhere between the Seine’s grey ripple and the seventh espresso of the afternoon, word reached the international press corps that Brian Schottenheimer—yes, that Schottenheimer, scion of football’s most reliable family tragedy—has been handed the keys to the Dallas Cowboys’ offense. The planet, distracted by minor irritants such as record heat in Delhi and the slow-motion…
The Crescent City has always been a place where the dead refuse to stay buried—levees break, jazz funerals turn into block parties, and the Saints keep rising from the crypt like Bourbon Street vampires with season tickets. From the banks of the muddy Mississippi, the New Orleans Saints have quietly become America’s most improbable export…
CeeDee Lamb and the Global Theater of Catch-and-Release By The Foreign Desk, Dave’s Locker Somewhere between the neon shrine of JerryWorld and the algorithmic bowels of TikTok, CeeDee Lamb—wide-receiver, reluctant fashion influencer, and occasional human piñata for defensive backs—has become the latest export in America’s ongoing experiment: turning kinetic talent into soft power. To the…
Gridiron Geopolitics: How the NFL Standings Quietly Rule the World Order By A. Correspondent, filing from a hotel bar in Singapore that still thinks the Patriots are the bad guys — The NFL’s weekly standings, for the uninitiated, look like a benign spreadsheet of wins, losses, and a few decimal points masquerading as science. But…
From the banks of the Mekong to the back alleys of Marseille, the phrase “NFC North” sounds like a cold-weather banking syndicate rather than a quadrant of American gladiatorial theatre. Yet here we are, in a year when even the Arctic Circle is on fire, watching four Midwestern franchises try to convince a planet drowning…
Todd Bowles, the man whose résumé reads like a postcard from the international league of professional displacement, has become the NFL’s accidental diplomat. One moment he was a quiet defensive savant in Tampa Bay, the next he was yanked into the cockpit of the Buccaneers like a UN peacekeeper parachuted into a war zone he…
