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Analysis | International

Miami: The World’s Hedonistic Emergency Exit—Global Capital’s Sunny Tax Shelter and Climate Collapse Catwalk
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

The world’s most reliable barometer of planetary dysfunction is not the Doomsday Clock, nor the Arctic sea-ice index, but the nightly queue outside LIV nightclub on Miami Beach. A thousand passport holders—Russian crypto heirs, Colombian narco-influencers, Saudi art-school dropouts, and at least one confused Norwegian pensioner who thought he’d booked a quiet Caribbean cruise—stand under…

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International | Sports

How Kirk Herbstreit Accidentally Became the Voice of Global Late-Night Anxiety
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Kirk Herbstreit and the Strange Global Empire of American Football Commentary Dave’s Locker – International Desk PARIS—At 03:47 CET, while most of the civilized world was either asleep or pretending to be, Kirk Herbstreit was live on ESPN International breaking down the Alabama-Georgia SEC Championship with the solemnity of a UN weapons inspector. Somewhere in…

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Analysis | International

William and Mary: The 335-Year-Old Coup That Still Pays Global Dividends
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

William and Mary, the Cosmic Double-Act Still Haunting the 21st Century by Our Man in the Duty-Free Lounge Somewhere between the duty-free perfume cloud at Dubai International and the 3 a.m. noodle counter in Bangkok, I found myself staring at a commemorative tea-towel emblazoned with the joint profiles of William III of Orange and Mary…

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Business | International

Jackson Hawes: The Accidental Emperor of Global Debt and Dubai’s Favorite Digital Prophet
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Jackson Hawes, the man who accidentally became the international poster child for late-stage capitalism, currently sits in a glass box in Dubai’s newest “innovation pavilion,” dispensing crypto advice to oligarchs who still think email is cutting-edge. It’s a long way from his parents’ garage in Ohio, where Hawes—then a 19-year-old with a God complex and…

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International | Trending

Dawson Knox and the Global Supply Chain of Sorrow: How One NFL Tragedy Became the World’s Commodity
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Dawson Knox and the Curious Export of American Grief A dispatch from the Department of Existential Exports By the time the news of Dawson Knox’s younger brother Luke’s death pinged European phones at 03:47 CEST—sandwiched between an Amber Alert and a crypto-scam push notification—the Buffalo Bills tight end had already become an unwitting case study…

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International | Sports

Raheem Mostert’s Global Sprint: How One NFL Cast-off Became Capitalism’s Fastest Metaphor
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Raheem Mostert and the Mirage of the American Dream, Observed from 34,000 Feet Above the Atlantic By Dave’s Locker International Desk Somewhere between Shannon and Reykjavik, the seat-back screen froze on a looping NFL highlight: Raheem Mostert slicing through the Cowboys’ defense like a tax lawyer through a loophole. The cabin lights dimmed, the flight…

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International | Sports

Dalton Kincaid: How One Tight End Became a Global Export Bigger Than Bourbon
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Dalton Kincaid: The Accidental Geopolitical Football Nobody Asked For By Our Man in the Cheap Seats, Somewhere Over the Mid-Atlantic Let us begin with the obvious: most of the planet had never heard of Dalton Kincaid until the Buffalo Bills decided he was worth a first-round draft pick and, more importantly, a 12-hour Twitter argument…

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International | Trending

Ollie Gordon II: How a Texas Tailback Just Became Globalization’s Favorite Gladiator
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Ollie Gordon II and the Global Theater of Running Very Fast in Circles By Dave’s International Desk of Mild Disillusionment Somewhere between the 40-yard line and the end zone of geopolitics, a 19-year-old from Fort Worth, Texas, has become the planet’s most efficient argument for the continued relevance of American excess. Ollie Gordon II—whose surname…

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International | Sports

América vs Pachuca: When a Media Empire Meets a Hedge Fund in Cleats
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

The Café of Broken Dreams, Somewhere Between Mexico City and Zurich Tuesday, 03:17 GMT-6 If you squint just right, the fluorescent glow of Estadio Azteca on Wednesday night looks less like flood-lights and more like the interrogation lamp of a very polite loan shark. Club América—Latin America’s self-appointed Galactic Empire—has rolled up to the semifinal…

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International | Sports

Global Spectacle Under Smog-Choked Skies: Bills vs. Dolphins as the World’s Guilty Distraction
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

Bills vs. Dolphins: A Sunday Opera Staged for a World That Can’t Look Away By Diego “The Miserable Optimist” Marín, Dave’s Locker Foreign Bureau Let us begin with the obvious: in a week when the planet’s average temperature is flirting with numbers normally reserved for sous-vide recipes, two American football teams have nonetheless convinced half…

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Analysis | International

Global Prime Obsession: How One Word Became the Passport to Modern Capitalism’s VIP Lounge
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

The Cult of “Prime” – How One Word Became a Global Status Symbol, Dystopian Membership Card, and Possibly a Religion They say Latin is dead, but in 2024 the lingua franca of power, convenience, and mild existential dread is a five-letter English word that once merely meant “first in order.” From São Paulo to Seoul,…

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International | Sports

Tua Tagovailoa: The Planet’s Favorite Concussion Metaphor — A Global Dispatch from Dave’s Locker
ByDaveslocker 19 September 2025

From Somewhere over the Pacific – The planet’s most cheerful concussion case study now plays in Miami, a city whose pastel skyline looks remarkably like a brain scan lit up by repeated micro-traumas. Tua Tagovailoa, the left-handed Samoan-Hawaiian-American quarterback with a résumé that reads like a medical thriller, has become a global Rorschach test: half…

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