Warriors vs Tigers: A Global Power Struggle in Fur and Feathers By Our Correspondent, Somewhere Over the Himalayas (Wi-Fi permitting) The phrase “warriors vs tigers” used to summon images of medieval tapestry and museum dioramas: a spear-brandishing man in a loincloth, a striped cat frozen mid-pounce, both equally doomed to become taxidermy. Fast-forward to 2024…
Selma Blair and the Global Business of Being Ill By the time Selma Blair’s cane clicked across the red carpet at the 2019 Vanity Fair Oscar party, the world had already perfected the art of monetising misfortune. From Syrian refugees live-streaming their border crossings on TikTok to Tokyo office workers crowdfunding funerals, suffering is now…
Ipswich Town vs Sheffield United: A Microscopic Battle in the Macrocosm of Chaos By Our Man in the Cheap Seats, Somewhere Over the Atlantic While cruise missiles rearranged the furniture over the Black Sea and central bankers in three continents rehearsed their best “we told you so” faces, 22 slightly winded Englishmen in polyester met…
Christopher Morel and the Great Global Reckoning of Mediocrity By Our Man in the Cheap Seats, Singapore Bureau Somewhere between the fifteenth replay of Christopher Morel’s latest defensive misplay and the twenty-third speculative trade rumor, the planet’s collective attention span flickered like a dying neon sign in a Bangkok alley. One moment the man is…
When TRT1 Izle Becomes the Global Village’s Guilty Pleasure A dispatch from the front lines of couch-bound internationalism By the time the muezzin’s fifth reminder drifts over Istanbul, the rest of Earth’s insomniacs have already hijacked TRT1’s live stream. In São Paulo it’s 3 a.m., prime hour for Brazilian crypto traders to unwind with a…
Lisbon, 9 April — In the grand tapestry of global events, where nuclear submarines play hide-and-seek in the South China Sea and central bankers rehearse their lines about “transitory” inflation, a modest football match at the Estádio da Luz somehow elbowed its way onto the world stage last night. Benfica versus Santa Clara, a fixture…
Sevilla vs Elche: A Microscopic Battle on the Edge of the Known Football Universe Sometime this weekend, while missiles arc over the Black Sea, supply chains whimper in the South China Sea, and the last adult on Earth tries to remember what “work-life balance” used to feel like, two modest football clubs will meet in…
Jeļena Ostapenko, the Latvian with a backhand that could slice through NATO red tape, is once again reminding the world that small nations occasionally produce very large explosions. While diplomats in Brussels rehearse the same stale talking points about “regional security architecture,” Ostapenko is out on Court Philippe Chatrier detonating tennis balls like a one-woman…
Sevilla’s Ramón Sánchez-Pizjuán Stadium, 21:00 local time, Tuesday. The floodlights slice through Andalusian night like surgical lamps over a patient that keeps insisting it’s perfectly healthy. Sevilla—perennial Europa League addicts and Champions League group-stage escape artists—host Elche, the modest club from Alicante whose greatest international achievement is probably being mispronounced by British commentators (“El-chee? Elsh?…
West Ham vs Arsenal: A London Derby as Global Farce By our man in the departure lounge, still waiting for the post-Brexit apology LONDON—On Sunday, two quarrelling postcodes will once again pretend the planet is watching. West Ham United, a club whose fans still sing about 1966 as if it were last week, host Arsenal,…
Aegean Tinderbox: Greece vs Turkey and the World’s Favorite Never-Ending Soap Opera By Correspondent-at-Large, Dave’s Locker There are two kinds of geopolitical feuds: the ones that end in mushroom clouds, and the ones that merely smolder for centuries like a cheap incense stick, periodically singeing the furniture. Greece versus Turkey is firmly in the second…
CU BOULDER: THE WORLD’S MOST POLITE GEOLOGICAL INSURRECTION Boulder, Colorado – For the uninitiated, the University of Colorado at Boulder looks like the sort of place where Mother Nature took a liberal-arts elective and never left. Flatirons the colour of burnt toast rise behind neo-brutalist dorms that appear to have been poured, not built. Students…
