Aurora Borealis Forecast: When the Sky Starts Trolling the Northern Hemisphere By Dave’s Locker Global Affairs Desk If you’ve spent the last decade doom-scrolling through melting ice caps, collapsing supply chains, and whatever fresh horror has popped up on your phone this morning, the universe has decided to throw us a cosmic lollipop: an unusually…
RABAT-NAMEY CORRIDOR — Somewhere between the mint tea in Casablanca and the dust storms in Niamey, two sovereign states have decided to treat the planet to a very North-African edition of “Why Can’t We Be Friends?” On paper, the spat between Morocco and Niger looks like a standard diplomatic lovers’ quarrel: the Moroccan ambassador was…
Apple TV: The Tiny Black Box That Conquered the World’s Living Rooms—Or at Least Tried To By the time you finish reading this sentence, Apple will have sold another three Apple TV units somewhere between Reykjavík and Riyadh. That’s the official corporate line, anyway; the real figure is probably closer to one unit and two…
John Bishop: A Name So Ordinary It Might Just Save the World By Our World-Weary Correspondent, Somewhere Between Duty-Free and Despair There are, according to the latest census of human paranoia, approximately 43,000 John Bishops alive at this moment. If you stacked them all horizontally they would reach from Liverpool to Lisbon—assuming none of them…
Faroe Islands vs Croatia: When the Atlantic Mists Meet Balkan Fire—A Study in Global Asymmetry The North Atlantic, home to more sheep than humans and weather patterns that make London look positively Mediterranean, has coughed up its perennial David: the Faroe Islands. Meanwhile, somewhere along the Dalmatian coast, Croatia has been polishing its Goliath credentials—World…
In the pantheon of contemporary tragedies that flicker across our screens before being swallowed by the algorithmic void, the Megan Boswell case stands as a particularly grim postcard from Appalachia—one that somehow manages to be both uniquely American and universally human in its grotesque particulars. While the name might not ring bells in Dubai or…
BMW’s iX3 Neue Klasse: A Bavarian Electromobile in a World Still on Fire By Dave’s Locker International Desk Munich, Shanghai, Timbuktu—wherever you are, the planet is overheating and your neighbor just bought another SUV. Into this planetary sitcom BMW has lobbed its latest punchline: the iX3 Neue Klasse, a battery-powered crossover whose very name is…
Alcaraz vs Djokovic: The Gladiator Match in Which the Colosseum Is Everywhere By Dave’s Locker Global Sports Bureau (with a flask in the press box) PARIS – On a late-spring afternoon when the Seine smelled only faintly of industrial despair and the Eiffel Tower’s lights blinked like a malfunctioning slot machine, two men in white…
Kodai Senga and the Global Art of Vanishing Stuff When Kodai Senga uncorks his ghost-forkball somewhere over the Atlantic this summer, the pitch will do more than dive like a drunk albatross—it will carry with it the weight of two countries’ mid-life crises, the hopes of a billion-dollar television deal, and the faint smell of…
From the Shard to São Paulo, a quiet corporate ghost has been flitting through medicine cabinets and quarterly earnings calls: Kenvue, the Johnson & Johnson spin-off that now owns everything from Tylenol to the sticky little BAND-AID you applied last week while pretending your kitchen knife skills were better than they are. In 2023, the…
Paris, May – Somewhere between the baguette crumbs and the drone debris, the Franco-Ukrainian pas de deux has entered its third year, and the orchestra is still tuning the same dissonant chord. On the surface, Emmanuel Macron plays the dashing understudy to Volodymyr Zelensky’s blood-spattered lead, pledging Mirage jets, long-range missiles, and—because this is France—an…
Italy vs Estonia: A Mediterranean Opera Meets a Baltic Ballad—And the World Watches the Encore By Dave’s Locker Global Affairs Desk ROME—Picture the scene: on one side, a boot-shaped colossus that once taught the planet how to conjugate love, war, and pasta. On the other, a country whose population could fit inside a single Roman…
