The FTSE 100: Britain’s Glittering Relic in a World That Moved On By Our Correspondent in London, Where the Rain Never Stops and the Past Never Dies Stand at Canary Wharf on a Tuesday morning and you can almost hear the clink of champagne flutes echoing from 1987—back when shoulder pads were wide, hair was…
**The Quiet Danish Exit: How Kasper Hjulmand’s Resignation Became a Global Parable About Failure, Redemption, and the Existential Horror of International Football** COPENHAGEN – In the grand theater of international football, where millionaires chase inflated leather spheres while entire nations perform collective emotional breakdowns in real-time, Kasper Hjulmand’s recent resignation as Denmark’s manager serves as…
Tom Hanks, West Point, and the Global Theater of Soft Power By Our Bureau Chief for Existential Irony, Geneva It is a truth universally acknowledged that when a beloved American actor dons a cadet-grey uniform, the world leans in—partly out of curiosity, mostly out of the same rubber-necking instinct that makes us watch multi-car pile-ups…
Laura Whitmore and the Global Cottage Industry of Micro-Celebrity By Our Man in the Departures Lounge, somewhere above the Irish Sea Somewhere in the algorithmic ether between Dublin and Dubai, Laura Whitmore has become a case study in how fame now travels lighter than hand luggage and lands heavier than sanctions. To most passport-holding adults,…
Kathmandu, Nepal – While the rest of the planet was busy live-tweeting the implosion of yet another tech mogul’s ego, Nepal quietly reminded everyone that altitude can still trump attitude. The Himalayan republic—sandwiched between two nuclear frenemies who can’t agree on whose map is more delusional—just pulled off two feats that actually matter: it wrapped…
Bill Pulte and the Gospel of Twitter Altruism: How One American Heir Became the Global Patron Saint of 280-Character Generosity By Matteo “Max” Marconi, International Desk, Dave’s Locker It usually takes a papal conclave, a Nobel committee, or at least a moderately corrupt FIFA vote to anoint a new global philanthropist. Yet in 2024 the…
Orbital Irony: How EchoStar Became Everyone’s Quiet Overlord By A. Sardonica, filed from the geostationary sweet spot 35,786 km above your apathy. EchoStar, the Denver-based satellite company your neighbor still confuses with a Bluetooth speaker, has spent three decades perfecting a business model once reserved for Bond villains: parking metal birds in the sky and…
Kristi Noem and the Global Talent for Shooting Yourself in the Foot—Twice By Dave’s Locker Foreign Correspondent (currently self-quarantining in a Reykjavik dive bar) If you want to understand how a South Dakota governor ricochets across international headlines, picture a pebble dropped into a stock pond in the Black Hills. The ripples reach Berlin think…
ASTS Stock: When Space Phones Become the New Oil, and the Irony Is Out of This World By Dexter Voss, Senior Orbital Affairs Correspondent It turns out the final frontier isn’t serenity or starlight—it’s a balance sheet. AST SpaceMobile (ticker: ASTS) has spent the past month rocketing up retail watch-lists like a drunk cosmonaut on…
If you happen to be sipping an overpriced flat white in Melbourne, queueing for a soggy crêpe in Paris, or silently judging the karaoke choices in a Seoul basement bar, chances are the name “Ben Shapiro” has ricocheted through your phone speaker at least once. The 5-foot-9 human reductio-ad-absurdum machine has become a rare American…
Open Stock: The World’s Panic Pantry, or How We All Became Amateur Preppers By the time you finish this sentence, someone in São Paulo will have panic-bought their fifteenth roll of industrial-grade aluminum foil, convinced the grid is about to collapse. That, dear reader, is the sound of “open stock” going global—an innocuous retail term…
Banksy, the world’s most famous vandal-entrepreneur, has spent three decades spray-painting the obvious onto other people’s walls and watching the global elite bid for the privilege of scrubbing it off again. From Gaza to Glastonbury, the anonymous Bristolian has turned moral clichés into blue-chip assets, proving that nothing travels faster than a platitude with a…
