Tonight, somewhere between the Arctic Circle and the last functioning Wi-Fi router in Gaza, twenty-two million souls will crane their necks at the same glowing rectangle to ask the same question: “What football game is on tonight?” The query itself is a kind of secular prayer—uttered in seven thousand languages, muttered over instant noodles in…
Tonight, the planet’s most overpaid mimes and ambulatory insurance liabilities will take the stage in three time zones, each match sold as a morality play with corporate logos. In Madrid, Real Madrid hosts Manchester City for the second leg of their Champions League quarter-final, a fixture UEFA markets as “El Clásico Lite” for viewers who…
Football on TV Tonight: 90 Minutes of Global Theatre, Sponsored by an Online Casino You’ve Never Heard Of Bylined from a hotel mini-bar in Doha, where the peanuts cost more than my first apartment. Tonight, somewhere between the war headlines and the weather report, a ball will be kicked on your screen and half the…
The Red Machine Reboots: Liverpool’s Champions League Squad as Global Metaphor By Our Man in Every Departure Lounge Liverpool, England – While the rest of the planet debates whether democracy is clinging to life support or merely on a smoke break, 25 men in matching tracksuits have quietly re-certified themselves as a planetary spectacle. Jürgen…
