Wigan Athletic’s Norwegian teenager, Thelo Aasgaard, has spent the past fortnight doing something no Scandinavian export has managed since flat-pack furniture: forcing the world to read the assembly instructions. One dazzling League One hat-trick later and the 20-year-old’s name is being Googled from Lagos to Lima by people who previously thought “Aasgaard” was either an…
DeAndre Hopkins, the man whose hands are insured for more than the GDP of Tuvalu, is once again a free-range wide receiver—an unsettling prospect for defensive backs and a clarion call to every franchise owner whose yacht is named after a tax haven. The NFL’s perennial trade carousel has coughed up Hopkins like a cat…
Deion Burks and the Geopolitics of a 40-Yard Dash By Dave’s Locker Global Desk If you’ve never heard of Deion Burks, congratulations—you have successfully avoided every American football highlight reel, every NIL money tracker, and every algorithmic rabbit hole that begins with “Top WR sleepers 2024.” For the rest of us, the name now carries…
Austin Peay vs. Georgia: When the World’s Problems Pause for 40 Minutes of Manufactured Hope by Diego Morales, International Correspondent-at-Large The University of Georgia Bulldogs—an outfit valued somewhere between a Baltic nation’s GDP and Jeff Bezos’ weekend yacht budget—took the floor Saturday against Austin Peay State University, whose annual athletics subsidy is roughly what the…
Morgan Rogers and the Grand Illusion of Modern Football By Dave’s Foreign Correspondent (Still Jet-Lagged in Dubai Duty-Free) There is a moment—usually around the 73rd minute, when the floodlights hum like tired cicadas and the stadium Wi-Fi finally buckles under 60,000 TikTok uploads—when a player like Morgan Rogers reminds the planet why it collectively agreed…
Tanner Scott and the Global Metronome of Baseball’s Arms Race By Dave’s Locker Correspondent in Exile, somewhere over the Atlantic The first time Tanner Scott’s slider detonated on international radar was not on ESPN’s highlight reel but on a grainy Taiwanese KBO stream that kept buffering like a Cold-War telex. Somewhere in Seoul, a bleary-eyed…
