Jess Glynne and the Universal Art of Not Giving a Damn By Our Correspondent Somewhere between Terminal 3 and Existential Crisis In the grand casino of global pop, where chips are counted in Spotify streams and the house always wins unless your name rhymes with “Lizzo,” Jess Glynne has quietly become the house wine: reliably…
Morgan Rogers and the Grand Illusion of Modern Football By Dave’s Foreign Correspondent (Still Jet-Lagged in Dubai Duty-Free) There is a moment—usually around the 73rd minute, when the floodlights hum like tired cicadas and the stadium Wi-Fi finally buckles under 60,000 TikTok uploads—when a player like Morgan Rogers reminds the planet why it collectively agreed…
Pete Wicks: The Existential Haircut Roaming a Planet on Fire By Dave’s Foreign Correspondent-at-Large, somewhere between duty-free vodka and the abyss In the grand, slow-motion car crash we politely call “current affairs,” certain names ricochet across the Anglosphere’s algorithmic echo chamber with the inexplicable persistence of a drunk uncle at a wedding. One such name…
Apple iPhone 17 Pro Max: The World Pauses, Blinks, Then Lines Up Anyway By Matteo “Mac” Alvarez, Senior Cynic-at-Large, Dave’s Locker Global Desk GENEVA — Somewhere between the collapse of the Antarctic ice shelf and the third attempted coup of the week in West Africa, humanity has quietly agreed that the only date that truly…
Teair Tart: The 315-Pound Canary in the Global Coal Mine By Dave’s Locker, International Affairs Desk On paper, Teair Tart is just an American football player—a 6’2″, 315-pound defensive tackle who recently signed with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers after stints with the Tennessee Titans and the Los Angeles Chargers. In practice, however, Tart has become…
Meghan Trainor and the Global Bass Line of Late-Stage Capitalism By our man in the departure lounge Somewhere above the North Atlantic, between the in-flight sushi and the eighth rewatch of “All About That Bass,” it hit me: Meghan Trainor is the perfect sonic ambassador for an era when geopolitical borders are closing but pop…
Chargers vs Chiefs: A Micro-Melodrama for a Planet That’s Already on Fire By Diego “No Refunds” Morales, International Desk The game will be played in Kansas City on Sunday, but the real action is everywhere else. From a windowless bar in Manila where the feed lags exactly six seconds behind Lagos—just long enough for a…
Liz Hurley at 59: How One British Actress Became the Planet’s Last Remaining Geopolitical Constant By the time the International Monetary Fund finished recalculating Argentina’s debt for the ninth time this decade, Liz Hurley had already posted another bikini selfie from an undisclosed Caribbean tax haven. While COP28 delegates argued over which hemisphere should foot…
Nationals vs Cubs: A Proxy War of Futility Played Out on Imported Grass By the time the Washington Nationals and the Chicago Cubs finish their three-game set this week, roughly 75,000 hot dogs will have vanished, 1.2 million beer cups will clog Midwestern landfills, and two sets of fans will convince themselves that “momentum” is…
Tokyo wakes up at 7 p.m. New York time, just in time to watch the S&P 500 futures twitch like a lab rat on its third espresso. In London, fund managers are already three cups in, praying the overnight move doesn’t blow up their bonus before breakfast. Meanwhile in São Paulo, a currency trader checks…
FanDuel and the Great Global Gamble: How One App Turned Every Human Into a Bookie By Dave’s International Affairs Desk (currently 3-1 on whether the editor reads this) If you squint at the planet from orbit, you can almost see the faint green glow of FanDuel pulsing from every sports bar, commuter train, and questionable…
Good Morning, World: How “GMA Deals & Steals” Became the Soft Power Bargain Basement of the 21st Century By Henrietta “Hank” Delacroix, Senior Correspondent, Dave’s Locker NEW YORK—While the United Nations Security Council bickers over commas in draft resolutions, a far more efficient form of geopolitics is unfolding at 8:07 a.m. Eastern inside a Times…
