Raiders Depth Chart: A Global Power Ranking of Hope, Hubris, and Third-String Linebackers By Our Correspondent in the Cheap Seats Las Vegas—The Raiders released their latest depth chart this week, a tidy Excel sheet that purports to map the hierarchy of 53 men who chase an oblong ball for money while wearing armor. To the…
The Browns’ Depth Chart: A Global Power Struggle in Shoulder Pads By Dave’s Locker Foreign Correspondent, still jet-lagged from Moldovan border traffic CLEVELAND—Somewhere between the Cuyahoga River and the Sea of Okhotsk, the Cleveland Browns’ depth chart has become the most democratic reading of American anxiety since the last Federal Reserve statement. On every continent…
PARIS – On the surface, the 2024 San Francisco 49ers schedule is a tidy spreadsheet of seventeen autumn Sundays, a few Mondays, one Thanksgiving evening (surely to the delight of tryptophan-dazed uncles coast-to-coast), and the obligatory Saturday cameo in December. Yet in the grander scheme—say, the scheme that keeps the lights on in Singapore sportsbooks,…
Amsterdam, Wednesday – While European bureaucrats argue over the precise circumference of a cucumber and American politicians auction off their dignity in thirty-second television spots, the planet’s most cosmopolitan sport keeps quietly exporting a very particular kind of hope: the multilingual, multi-passport, multi-time-zone wide receiver named Amon-Ra St. Brown. Born in Anaheim to a German…
Eagles Schedule: The 17-Week American Gladiator Calendar the Rest of the World Pretends Not to Watch By the time the NFL’s 2024 Philadelphia Eagles schedule dropped—on a Thursday night, because nothing says urgency like prime-time marketing—the planet was already busy. Tokyo’s Nikkei had closed up 0.4 % on semiconductor gossip, Berlin’s Bundestag was arguing about…
